Bi-Weekly Patience/ Communication Practice: Staying in Topic

You'll notice two updates to the Patience Practice Series: 1) It's bi-weekly, and even that's subject to change, should I feel the need to be particularly patient; 2) There is also a focus on communication, because I believe my difficulties in each realm are intrinsically tied to and demonstrated by the other. Finally, it's obvious but still of-note to mention that I will continue to live with the mantra "Pick Your Battles" painted in my mind. The idea is that these practices will become habit. Feel free to remind me of them at any time.

This next practice is one I decided to do without outside research. I do think it's highly valuable to research these practices from external sources. Like most people, the problem is not knowing where my flaws lie but figuring out what to do about them. Still, I am aware of the fact that in conversations I often jump between topics. The source of such hyperactivity is anxiety, curiosity, a desire to keep the conversation flowing, and hyperactivity itself. I have had several people comment on this fact, more proof that it is actually a huge detriment to discourse. Plus, it makes me look like a kindergartener on cake. Or like I have an eating disorder (and Lord knows I don't want to look like that).

So, over the course of this next two weeks-ish I will concentrate on staying on topic in my conversations. I think the best way to achieve this is by allowing the conversation to naturally dawdle and waiting for the other person to offer a new topic when it does. Potential landmines include silent time, censuring my ideas, and the desire to ask more questions. It will also take a lot of energy: I'm so used to putting in new ideas that it actually takes far more energy to censure myself than keep chatting.

Through yoga and treatment I've learned that one of the best ways to stimulate more energy is actually to foster internal repose, to water the energy inside of you rather than ripping out the seeds and trying to plant afresh. By relaxing in conversations, really listening to what the person is saying, and identifying my own responses before I say them, I believe I can cultivate the internal energy required to be blabber-free. My mantra: "pottum," which in Tamil means "enough."

Give me a call! Invite me to lunch! I can't wait to listen to you. Maybe we'll even sit in silence.

Free of my own loquaciousness.